here

I might not have all my ducks in a row but my eggs are another story.

I may not have all my ducks in a row but my eggs are another story.

I’m not sure if there is anyone left around here to read these words but I think I will type them none the less. A 9 month absence must be enough to kill a blog, especially a little one like mine, but I will write because I need to dump all of these words and thoughts out of my head. I need to keep a record of our days and experiences if for no other reason than that I want my kids to have it. So, I suppose, it doesn’t really matter if there is anyone here reading this as long as someday in the future the kids do.

I know I have said this before but this was meant to be a journal of our homesteading experiences and this year has been real short on the homesteading bit. I mean, we are still here, still chopping firewood and moving sheep, still butchering our own animals for food, still pulling a plant or two out of the ground to grace our dinner table but it all seems far and few between and certainly not noteworthy enough to write a post for. Really, what would that look like anyway?

We woke up this morning and walked the 10 sheep 10 feet from pasture 1 to pasture 2 today.

or

We harvested carrots for tonight’s dinner from our one and only row planted this year.

Awe inspiring it is not.

So rather than manufacturing posts and scraping together a few pictures, I just avoided it all together. Spring and Summer around here were spent mostly in doctors’ offices, either for my issues or for pre-op, op, and post-op (which in the end lasted months longer than it should have) on Kevin’s right knee. Our two biggest projects consisted of Kevin digging a new waterline out to our overwinter pastures (which took nary a long weekend) and him rebuilding our back deck, a highly boring job but one that had to be done, lest the whole thing went crashing down sometime this winter, buckling under the weight of two feet of snow.

Of course, we still felt busy because while none of those things look all that impressive individually, string 1000 mundane moments together and they still take up a hell of a lot of time. Add in that half of those 1000 things involve an animal with an instinct, an agenda and a mind of its own you might as well multiply it by a million. On top of it all there are two little kids needing time and attention (Exhibt A: while just typing this I had to field a question from PJ as to what is actually happening when we burn wood in the woodstove. This led into a discussion of atoms, molecules, hydrogen, carbon, waste products, atmospheric gases, incinerators and how it all impacts the environment.) Granted, we got our science lesson for the week (month? next year?) out of the way but you can see how this might all make a mom (and dad for that matter) a little too tired to muster a weekly blog post.

So what else is there to say? I have missed writing and all the cathartic side effects that come along with it. I have struggled with what to write about and how to walk that line of feeling like I have to share and sharing because I want to. I want to connect with other like minded people as well as people that can help me expand my mind. I’m not going to make any broad sweeping statements that I am going to show up here every day, or every week for that matter, but I do know that I want to show up. How that’s all going to play out I have no idea but I do know if anyone wants to come along I sure would enjoy the company.

16 thoughts on “here

  1. I like this. I like you.
    The conclusion I’ve come to is this: just a sentence or two will suffice. It’ll keep our writing blood flowing. It’ll be something you come back to and admire. It’ll be YOUR space, on your time. It doesn’t matter when that is. Just make it happen. 😉
    Lots of love
    Van

  2. I’m in such unity with you Vanessa and you Laura and I happen to adore the pair of you so very much and I’m happy so happy to have turned on my computer this morning and as I began to browse my stream I saw the eggs and I knew…..I KNEW you were BACK and if I could do real actual cartwheels I would be doing them right now! See, we are here. I always love to read your words. I do. Yep. even if it’s one sentence. Just as you say…getting it out. I need my space just exactly for that.

    Love your friend Tracie

    • Traci,

      Your friendship, love and encouragement means the world to me. Without your gentle and loving reminders in regards to this space I’m not sure I would have found myself here writing again. You are such an amazing, beautiful soul and I count myself lucky to have your in my life even though we have never actually met.

      Lots of Love Always,
      -L

      • I’m so happy to see you received such a warm homecoming in your space. So much support and you were missed, truly missed. Sometimes I think my gift is encouragement. It seems to come very natural to me. I love to see others I like succeed. It’s a win/win.

  3. I’m still here and I think this is a great place for you to continue to share – whatever you want. It can be a sentence or a paragraph whatever you have time or the need to.

    You need the space and this is the perfect place…

    • Thank you so much, Michelle. Comments and encouragement like yours are one of the very reasons I need to keep showing up in this space. I love the connection that can be made here!

      ❤ -L

    • Kim,

      So nice to “see” you again. Not only have I not been showing up here, but I haven’t been keeping up with my blog reading either. I look forward to catching up with you in your space too!

      All the best,
      -L

  4. See? We’re here, too. And happy to read whatever it is that you decide to write about. Although, I must say that re: homesteading & homeschooling, what you wrote about today is IMPORTANT because it is AUTHENTIC and TRUE. We are so used to seeing big, exciting, polished, and branded websites and blogs on every topic, and while that is great and all and may, for some, be an accurate representation of life, for all the rest of us, life doesn’t look like that. And we shouldn’t think that means our lives are small or uninteresting. I (un)homeschooled my kids until they went into high school. I KNOW what that mess looks like, lol. So, please, please write about your one row of veggies and your 10 sheep moving 10 feet and your boring porch rebuild—please continue to be a beautiful and authentic voice for what a good, slow life is. It is needed.

    • Dre,

      I’m so glad you’re still here. I am horrible and I owe you the LONGEST(!!!) email in history. But I want to say here thank you for your beautiful comments. It’s funny because Kevin and I were just talking about authenticity (especially in regards to this blog) and it is what I kept coming back to and what I feel hadn’t been in this space in quite some time. (mostly due to me holding too many things close when I really should have been sharing them!) I think that is one reason I had been avoiding it writing all together, but I’m going to strive for that authenticity and your encouragement means the world. I had to laugh at your comment about messy unschooling because that’s it. You get it!!! I’m going to warn you now that email coming your way probably just got twice as long now that I have that tidbit of info about you and your family. Amazing similarities and coincidences between you and I, my dear. I am so thankful our paths crossed!!

      I promise to be a better pen pal from here on out. 😉

      ❤ -L

  5. Lovely to see you back. I seem to be a reader these days. I haven’t put anything on my almost non-existent blog for months, but I do love to see what others are doing. I saw your blog pop up and my emails and though wow, has it really been a long time or did I just miss your posts. Nope, it’s been a while. But it doesn’t matter, nice to see you back. And I do love your little eggs. 🙂

    • Thank you Cathie!!

      So glad to see you here. And yes, it has been a very long time. Hope all is well with you and yours and I look forward to reconnecting with you here. 🙂

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